Uemura Kano: Toilet God Song

Uemura Kana got a huge hit this year with her 10 minute long ballad called Toilet God. A sweet story of her memories of growing up with her obaasan, who taught her how to be a beautiful woman. This is for all of us who had the privilege to spend a lot of time with our grandparents when we were young. Enjoy. Yes, in Japan there are all kinds of gods for all kinds of occasions and situations, even today. Is it shinto? You decide. Even Mure Dickie at the Financial Times thinks this is a tune worth linking too ;)

“Japanese like simple and compact designs, but Chinese consumers tend to prefer a bit more form and decoration,” says Junko Kawaide, Inax’s Expo manager.

Such concern for Chinese tastes is a relatively recent phenomenon for many Japanese companies. Inax, for example, has been manufacturing bathroom fittings , tiles and toilets in China for years, but has only recently seen the country as a serious market for its high-technology toilets with their automated seats, massaging shower units, deodorisers and sound systems.

“At first we were producing here for Japan, but now we are putting more and more emphasis on the Chinese market,” Ms Kawaide says.

Lyrics from JpopAsia:

Toire No Kamisama

About the time I was in 3rd grade
I lived with my grandmother
My parent's house was next door but
I lived with my grandmother

Everyday I helped out
I even played gobang
But my grandmother said this to me
because I couldn't clean the toilet

My goodness, there's
a goddess at the toilet
that's why if you clean the toilet
You can become beautiful like the goddess

From that day on
I started making the toilet shine
I'll definitely become a beautiful woman
Every day I polished it

When we went out to go shopping
We both had roasted duck
My grandmother missed her new comedy show
and cried and blamed me

My goodness, there's
a goddess at the toilet
that's why if you clean the toilet
You can become beautiful like the goddess

I became an adult
and I bumped heads with grandma
I couldn't make a family
and I had no place to stay

I didn't return home on days off
I was out with my boyfriend
Both of us stopped playing
gobang and eating roasted duck

I wonder why people hurt others
and we lose things close to us
she was always by my side and I left her alone

It's been two years since I left for Tokyo
grandma is in the hospital
She's losing weight and got thin
I went to go see her

I said, "granny, I'm back!"
just like I used to
Even though we spoke a little bit
I said I'll come back and left the room

The next morning grandma
quietly fell asleep
it was just as if
she was waiting for me to come back
Even though she raised me properly
Even though I could repay her back
Even though I wasn't a good grandchild
She waited for me

My goodness, there's
a goddess at the toilet
that's why if you clean the toilet
You can become beautiful like the goddess

I had a dream to become
a wife in a good dispostion
today I'm going to
make the toilet shine alone

Thank you
Thank you
from the bottom of my heart

Meanwhile, back in Sweden, people are making and promoting phosphorus-separating toilets that look like this:

Why? Because P (as in NPK) is an important plant fertilizer/nutritient that should not be wasted. I am hoping this is a trend that will catch on in Japan (and China) as well.


Pandabonium said…
Re: separating toilets

Interestingly, the US source for most of it's phosphorus (a surface mine in Florida) has past peak production, and now the US is starting to import the element from Morocco, with a stop in Norway for refining.

No phosphates mean no RNA, DNA, or bones. And no crops. That kind of toilet is going to be in demand.
Pandabonium said…
Oops - that should read "passed peak"....
Martin J Frid said…
The NPK ingredients are so very precious, yet they have been terribly wasted (for example on crops for animal feed rather than directly on veggies and cereals for human consumption). P in particular seems to be a major hurdle. Watch out.

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